10 Things
by xana4
Summary: Deeks goes undercover for LAPD one last time before becoming an agent. However, he leaves a list of tips of how to deal with Kensi in case someone comes to take his place during his time away.
1. Chapter 1

**10 simple things **

_Summary: Deeks goes undercover for LAPD one last time before becoming an agent. However, he leaves a list of tips of how to deal with Kensi in case someone comes to take his place during his time away._

1. Don't ever, under any circumstances, imply that she hits like a girl. If you do that she will proceed to prove you that that statement is only true if the girl you're referring to is a professional wrestler who can kick your butt in less than five minutes and without any kind of warning.  
><em><span>Very important note<span>_: This can also make you earn a very embarrassing trip to the emergency room where you'll have to explain your doctor that the person who did this much damage to your body was not a drunk guy you got into a fight with in a bar but your female partner.

2. Never use the word cute to describe how she looks. Most girls would appreciate being described like that but Kensi Blye is not most girls. Using her name and the word cute in any sentence will make you earn some kind of revenge from her and trust me when I say this; you do not want to know what her revenge feels like. Read note above for more details.

3. Never stare at her for more than one minute with a smile on your face. It doesn't make her see that you are thinking about her. It makes her think you're creepy and that you're picturing her naked. Please keep in mind that she as a loaded gun with her at all times and a very good aim. Just thinking about the place where she would probably shoot at gives me stomachaches. Also, staring at her through a mirror just makes it even creepier and will grant you a well-deserved slap in the face. And after that happens, don't imply that it didn't hurt or that she hits like a girl (re-read number 1 for more detailed explanation for that one).

4. Don't tell her she looks hot. It's better if you simply imply it by sending her a small smile or even a smirk if you're feeling extra-daring. Actually saying that she looks hot will make her mad at you. Well, not made because people don't get made. _Dogs get made. People get angry._ One way or another, if you do call her hot you can't say that she hit you with no reason whatsoever. That will only intensify her angriness and that will lead to that very embarrassing trip to the emergency room I told you about earlier on.

5. Avoid at all costs showing up at her place without calling ahead. She doesn't like to receive visitors in the middle of the night, something that I've learned the hardest way possible. If you can't sleep and it's 3 in the morning do not, and I repeat because you really need to understand this one for your own safety, do not drive to her house expecting her to be awake at that hour. Go for a walk in the beach, watch TV, listen to music…do anything but don't show up at her doorstep in the middle of the night without warning her first. She keeps a baseball bat near her bed and is not afraid to use it with unwanted visitors.

6. Never call her in the middle of the night. Kensi is not Callen. She needs to sleep and gets very irritably if she doesn't. If you call her in the middle of the night and wake her up for no good reason there will be hell to pay for that stunt. If you slip and call her after midnight and before 7 and she sounds sleepy when she answers the phone, you're best option is to stay in complete silence. Don't make a sound and try to make her believe your phone dialed her number by mistake. Fake snoring if you have to. Of course, the real challenge comes the day after when she asks you. That's when you need to have the balls to look her in the eye and lie to her.

7. Don't lie to her. No matter what you do, don't lie to her. Even if the situation looks bad don't resort to lying. She is a very well trained federal agent and can see a lie a mile away. If you don't want to upset her tell her the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I can't stress this point enough because this is something she really hates. It makes her think you either don't trust her or you did something really bad. Either way, you're screwed. If she sees you're lying, run but run fast.

8. Don't run away from her. Seriously, running away from her can only make your already bad situation even worse. She will eventually catch you. Kensi is a fast runner and hiding doesn't work either because she knows every hiding spot inside this building. The only thing you are doing when you run away from her is delaying your inevitable and probably painfully punishment. It's best for you to stay very still and embrace your fate.

9. Don't ever talk about her eating habits. Kensi eats burritos for breakfast and donuts are one of her favorite things ever. She never goes a day without coffee nor without some sort of candy. Don't talk about it because the truth is that better people than you tried but none succeeded. Just accept it and give her some chocolate once in a while. Don't do it too often or she'll think you're trying to tell her she's gaining weight or something like that. Also, don't ask her for some of her candies. That only works with some people. Well, it works with two people and that's Callen and I. Anyone else who dares to touch any candy that belongs to her will suffer the consequences that inevitable come with said action.

10. Don't ever do anything that might hurt her in any way. I will explain this one a little better because I believe it's one of the most important ones. Kensi is not the kind of girl who needs protection but here's the deal. Hurt her in any way or contribute to get her hurt in any way and there will be hell to pay. If you do this, the very embarrassing trip to the hospital room is not going to be your main concern. Sam is as strong as he seems to be and is not afraid to use all that strength to cause you severe pain if you do anything to her but keeping her safe. Callen is even more over-protective than what you might think. Lay a finger on Kensi and Callen will make sure that you never have children, if you know what I mean. Now, read this part very carefully. You don't know me but I'm stronger than what I look like and I'm more over-protective when it comes to Kensi than what it looks like. If she's not exactly the way I left her when I last saw her, I'll make sure no one ever finds your body.

Well, I hope we're clear when it comes to all the rules. Just keep her safe until I get back and keep this list in mind. You should be fine for just a couple of months. Don't even think about the fact that she managed to scare away 7 partners before I came along. That will only give you awful nightmares.

Good luck, buddy…you'll need it.

**X**

**X**

**X**

**This is just something I wrote during a slightly boring afternoon. What do you think?**

**I'm thinking about writing Kensi's reaction to that list but only if you like this one.**

**Reviews are highly appreciated,**

**Sarah**


	2. Chapter 2

Kensi walks in the bullpen and is immediately greeted by Callen's amused expression.

She frowns but puts her things on her desk anyway and grabs some coffee, not even bothering to look at the tea that Hetty keeps leaving next to it hoping that one of them will finally gain some sense and drink tea instead of coffee. It's not likely that it will happen anytime soon but no one can be mad at her for trying.

She finally grabs the steaming mug and lets herself sink into the scent she loves so much and that always wakes her up even on those though sleepy mornings. However, when she turns back around, her mood is brought down.

Callen keeps looking at her with an amused expression.

She sighs and decides to try to figure out what's going on with him. "Is there something you'd like to share with me?"

Callen shakes his head and grabs the newspaper in front of him to try and disguise that look on his face. Sam walks in a few minutes later and frowns when he sees his partner's expression. When he asks him what's with him and doesn't receive an answer he turns to Kensi.

She just shrugs and takes a sip of her coffee. "Don't even bother looking at me like that. The only thing I know is that if he doesn't drop that stupid and annoying look I'm going to punch him."

Sam lets out a laugh and sits on his desk. "Well, I believe you when you say that."

Kensi frowns and turns to Sam, completely forgetting about Callen and his amused look. "What is that supposed to mean?"

Callen lets out a laugh from behind his newspaper but is Sam who answers him. "It's supposed to mean that you've been kind of stressed out ever since Deeks left for that undercover assignment three weeks ago. I believe you could punch someone just out of pure boredom. I have to admit that things have been kind of boring around here without him. Without the usual banter between you two things have been unusually silent."

Callen lowers his newspaper and looks at Sam with a grin. "I thought you liked silence. Weren't you the one who was trying to meditate just a few months ago?"

Sam turns to Callen with an annoyed expression on his face. "I like silence but I'm not used to this place being so calm. It kind of creeps me out sometimes."

Callen is not done mocking him yet. "Are you saying you actually miss Deeks, Sam?"

Sam doesn't have the opportunity to answer because Kensi lets out what can only be described as a horrified scream that has them both turning to her so fast that they almost pull a muscle. What Callen sees, however, makes him start laughing once again and dropping the mocking with Sam.

Kensi is holding a white envelope that Callen immediately recognizes. It has something written on it and Sam gets up to read what is on it. As soon as he does he starts laughing too.

_To the unlucky guy who will be partnered with Kensi while I'm gone (simple rules to live)_

Kensi doesn't seem to think this is funny, though. "That's why you had that look on your face this morning? You knew about this already?"

Callen holds one hand up in sign of defense. "I found it this morning when I arrived. I was looking for his reports about our last assignment and found that on his top drawer. Don't kill the messenger, remember? Don't lash out on me for this. Besides, you should probably read it. I bet it will be hilarious…"

Sam laughs even harder with this and Kensi gets even angrier. "I'm not going to read this. I don't even want to know what he wrote in this. Just burn it for all I care."

With that she storms off, dropping the letter on Callen's desk and stopping their laughter.

They can see this is not just because of the letter. No, because they know Kensi can take a joke and they are sure this is just something Deeks wrote as a joke. Yes, because he knew that Hetty wouldn't hire somebody to replace him, not even during his time away.

Callen lets out a sigh and follows Kensi, leaving the letter with Sam.

He can't resist the curiosity and opens it.

The first page makes him laugh from top to bottom because Deeks really knows Kensi and knows how to handle her better than anyone else. The second page makes him smile. He reads it once again before taking off to find Kensi and Callen.

She needs to read this.

Sam finds them on Nate's old office.

Kensi has her head on Callen's shoulder and the man has his arms wrapped around her. It's weird to seem them like this because Callen is the guy who doesn't let anyone see the affectionate side of him and doesn't go around hugging people and Kensi is not the type of girl who usually needs comfort.

They look up when he opens the door and Sam can swear that Kensi wipes away a tear. He sends her a soft understanding smile and hands her the piece of paper. "Read this, Kensi."

Kensi accepts it with a shaky hand and an unsure look on her face. Callen drops a gentle kiss on the top of her head and leaves the room with Sam, understanding that this is something she must do alone. She takes a deep breath and starts reading it.

**X**

**X**

**I'm mean, I know. Do you want to know what's in that piece of paper? Do you want to know what happened in Nate's office between Kensi and Callen?**

**If you do, leave a review. If you don't care about that thank you for reading anyway.**

**What do you think?**

**Sarah**


	3. Chapter 3

_**Final Chapter**_

Kensi enters the office that has been empty for such a long time now. Nate has been gone for so long that she can't say she doesn't miss him. Yes, he never was one of those people she opened up with without caring about his judgments. She always knew that he didn't mean to be judgmental but that's how it looked like in her eyes. She sits on the couch and waits. Kensi waits because she knows Callen came after her. That's what he always does. No matter how much they fight, no matter how bad the situation is, no matter how upset she is…he always comes for her. He understands her and sees her as a little sister. He told her once that he enjoyed looking out for her because Sam and Kensi were the closest thing he had to a family and Sam doesn't need to be protected.

He walks inside just a few seconds after her and sits next to her. They stay in silence for a few seconds and he's the one who ends up breaking it. "Why do I get the feeling that this is not just because of the letter?"

Kensi lets out a weak laugh as a tear makes its way down her cheek. "It's not just about the letter. I may be messed up but I'm not that much."

Callen is looking at her, trying to figure out what's going on inside her head but it's an impossible mission. There is no way anyone can tell what's going on inside Kensi's head. Well, Deeks can sometimes but Callen decides not to go there right now. There will be plenty of time to talk to her about this 'thing' between her and Deeks when she's not as upset as she is right now. "Do you want to tell me what this is about then?"

Kensi sobs softly and meets Callen's eyes. "Do you remember what happened the last time Deeks went undercover for LAPD? Because I sure as hell can't forget about it…He almost got killed, Callen. I can't lose another partner. I can't lose him."

Callen grabs her hand and squeezes it with a gentle smile on his face, the kind of smile a parent would use to sooth a child after a bad dream. "It's not about losing a partner, is it? It's about losing _him_…That's what's really getting to you."

Kensi doesn't even try to deny it. One way or another, she can't lie to Callen so there's no point in doing it. "So what if it is? Deeks…he's my friend. Losing him would hurt too much, Callen. He didn't even say goodbye this time. At least not a real one. The only thing he told me before he left was to take care of myself. There was no 'I'll be back' or 'I'll be here before you know it'…I know it's stupid but I really needed to hear that."

She doesn't tell him more than that because she's honestly not sure of how much more is there to tell. He left and their 'thing' was far from being resolved.

Callen wraps and arm around her and kisses the top of her head to try to give her some comfort she desperately needs. Kensi allows him to give her that and relaxes in his arms. When Sam comes in and hands her the letter she doesn't want to open it and read the silly things he wrote there. She doesn't want to think that this will be the last joke she'll ever witness coming from him. But there's something on Sam's eyes that tell her she should definitely read it. So she accepts it and they leave her alone to read it.

She reads the first page and can't help but laugh at the things her partner wrote about her. Then she starts reading the second page and it brings a smile to her face and tears to her eyes.

_Attention everyone, this part of the letter is meant for Kensi's eyes only. And be careful because if you're not Kensi and you're reading this you're just bringing unnecessary trouble upon yourself._

_Kensi, I'll be back. You know I will.  
>I didn't say that to you because I don't think I would be able to say just that.<br>You're my partner and I feel awful for not saying goodbye to you but that's the way it has to be. You might be wonder woman but I'm not nearly as strong as you are. There are some things I find somewhat hard to do. I can't say goodbye to you because that would be acknowledging the fact that I might not come back from this.  
>I know I'm probably being a bit pessimist but we both know that in our line of work we can never be sure of anything. Sometimes the easy op can be the one that ends up worst that any other one.<br>Look, if something happens to me I wrote you another letter. You will find it on the top drawer of my nightstand. I hope it doesn't come to that but if something happens to me I need to know that there is nothing left unsaid. However, if you go there and read it just out of pure curiosity even though nothing happened to me there will be no donuts for you for at least a month. You've been warned, Kensi Marie Blye.  
>I'll see you soon, Fern. I'll be there to piss you off once again before you know it.<em>

Kensi lets out a teary laugh by the end of it and folds the letter before putting it on her pocket and going downstairs with a smile on her face.

X

3 months later

Deeks parks his car outside the familiar building he missed so much during the past few weeks. He allows himself to let out a sigh of what can only be described as relief looking at the NCIS building. For some reason, this feels like home. He gets out of the car and enters the doors, looking forward to see everyone again. The first person he sees is Callen.

The agent looks at him with a smile on his face and shakes his hand. "Welcome back, Deeks."

Sam greets him the same way and Deeks finally gets a glimpse of what it feels like to feel at home in the work place. The he goes to find Kensi. He takes a wild guess and ends up finding her at the gym, running on the treadmill. He smiles to himself and walks to his partner.

As soon as he's close enough to be heard, Deeks whistles at her to grab her attention. She turns to him and jumps off the machine with a large smile on her face. "I can't picture anything better than my sweating breathless partner greeting me when I come back after months away."

Kensi punches him playfully on the arm and he pretends to be deeply wounded before grabbing her upper arm and pulling her to him for a much needed hug. Kensi relaxes in his arms and breathes in his scent. God, how much she has missed him…

Then Deeks leans in and whispers in her ear. "You were the only thing I could think about whenever I was alone."

Kensi pulls back and meets his eyes. What she sees there should probably scare her more than what it actually does. In fact, a few months ago, seeing that much care and adoration on Deeks eyes would have made her run away from him. Now, she just offers him a small smile and pushes him back when he leans in to kiss her. Deeks looks at her questioningly so she looks around before talking again.

"I didn't tell anyone about us."

Deeks lets out a groan of frustration and grabs her hand. He pulls her to him and doesn't allow her to push him away this time. "Princess, I've spent the past four months away from you. Do you know how hard it was for me to sleep alone after all those nights I got to fall asleep with you in my arms? I don't care about what anyone else thinks. I'm going to kiss you now because I missed you. Do you have a problem with that?"

Kensi shakes her head with a smile and allows him to kiss her, responding to him as soon as his warm lips connect with hers. She would never admit how much she missed him or how many nights she had to sleep in the living room couch just because the bed felt way too cold and empty without him there.

From afar, Nell and Eric witness the reunion of the two partners with smiles on their faces. Nell dragged Eric away from the gym as soon as Deeks kissed Kensi and once outside she finally allowed herself to speak. "Did you film it?"

Eric nodded and the two of them rushed to the bullpen. Callen turned to them with a suspicious look on his face and Sam frowned when he noticed that Eric was walking around with his phone, something he never did. "What do you have there, Eric?"

Eric handed the phone to Callen who sighed as soon as he saw what was on it. "That, Sam, is the proof that you and Callen own us 20 bucks each. We won."

Callen tried to fight back. "This doesn't prove that they were already together before he left. It only proves that they're together now."

Eric carried on. "See the whole video. In the beginning Deeks tells her how hard it was to sleep without her after they spent so many nights together."

Callen gives up and hands him the money.

Sam does the same and turns back to Callen with a smirk. "How long do you think it will take them to let us know?"

Callen seems to think for a few seconds before answering him. "I say two weeks."

Eric turns to them and joins the conversation. "Want to bet on it?"

Then Nell clears her throat and they all pretend to talk about something else as Kensi and Deeks walk in the bullpen with a smile on their faces. Eric and Nell go upstairs and Sam and Callen simply pretend not to notice what's going on between the two partners.

They are happy and, as long as they don't let their relationship interfere with their work, everything's okay.

Somehow, they know that Deeks won't hurt Kensi. Somehow, they know that Kensi is not going to shut him out.

This is definitely the beginning of something new.

**Done!**


End file.
